Is this who we are?

I am at a lost for words when it comes to the people I see around me. It seems like the word responsibility has yet to enter the vocabulary of the majority of the people that stand up and call themselves adults. Has the day in age long passed when an adult was someone who stood up and admitted their faults, admitted their wrong doings and asked what they could do to fix it? Are we the generation of ‘not my fault’ adults? Are we now the people who pass the buck, and find excuses in the world for our short comings? Do we avoid responsibility because we cannot be bothered with it? Do we find fault in others because we cannot see fault in ourselves? Do we give hand outs simply because people have asked for them? Is this truly who we, the people have become?

We live in a world were everyone gets a trophy. Everyone gets an award or no one does. In order to make people not feel unspecial we take everything special out of actually succeeding so that everything is the same. Everyone is equal, no one kid is better than the other. What do the others have to reach for if they are not reaching to be the best? What is the reason for being the best and staying that way if you are never acknowledge for it? We take down our #1 because we do not to hurt #20 feelings. We shoot our best horse in the leg because our worst is sad about the race. This is what this world has become and we have taught our children it is okay not to do your best because you will be treated like everyone else.

If one person messes up than everyone stays to fix it, because the team should have been looking out for them. I am sorry, but the team was to busy making sure the team did not mess up. It is hard to monitor everyone and yourself all at once. Why is this one member failing, when the team is succeeding? Is it the team, or is it the member? There is no more weak link in the chain. We cannot hurt the links feelings so we say all the links are weak. Do you know what you get when all the links in your chain are weak? Someone is going to break your chain. This society of blanket rewards and punishments has turned us all into reward seeking dogs, who cry at their masters feet when they do not get what they want.

A little girl hates the answer daddy gave her so se goes to mommy to find the right one. Mommy hugs her and tells her she is special and now daddy is mean and bad for telling her the truth. This behind the scenes, back stabbing, find a way no matter what to get what I want is disgusting. When an adult hears something they do not like, they work to get what they want. When a child hears something they do not like they cry until they get what they want. The back handed deals, the running behind peoples back makes me sick to my stomach. The thought that someone can call themselves and adult and still scheme and plot to get their way is truly one of the great faults in the work place.

We live in a world of self entitlement. Because we were born we are entitled to certain rights though we have done nothing to deserve them. We say ‘give me money’ though we do not work. We say ‘give me food’ though we have not paid for it. We say ‘give me shelter’ though we have not built it. The phrase is ‘give me, give me, give me,’ instead of ‘how can I earn this.’

A child screams in the store for it’s mother to buy it a candy bar.

The mother says “If you are good mommy will get you that candy bar.”

What happened to, wash the car, earn the dollar, buy the candy bar. We think it is okay to just get things for simply being there and not causing trouble.

The worker says, “Give me an award.”

The supervisor says, “Please do not cause a fuss and I will give you an award.”

Now everyone thinks they should get an award for simply showing up for work and not causing a scene. We make it okay for the mediocre to continue to be just that, mediocre.

“Boss I have not been late once for work in three months, may I have a raise?” asked the good worker.

“Sure why not.” says the boss too afraid to say no.

How about no. Keep showing up for work on time and you can keep your job, if show up early and help out from now on I will give you a raise.

Have we forgotten the definition of the word best? Have we surpassed the time when the best got the best and the rest got the rest? I was taught that if I wanted the best in life I was going to have to work for it. If I wanted to be number one I would have to work my ass off to prove why I am number one, and when I got there, never stop working because the jobs not done yet. I was taught to never stick my hand out, but to find a way to make it on my own. I was taught, asking for help is okay, but only when you truly need it, because if you ask for help Sunday through Friday, when Saturday rolls around help might not be there. This philosophy is no longer needed in this world I live in now. This world where everyone gets the best and no one earns it.

Since when is a hard days work something to complain about? What happened to the day when people where thankful for their job and worked their hardest to keep it? It seems like the negative complainers are getting the best of this world. It is now cool to gripe and moan about how your job sucks then it is to try and find a way to improve it. I was asked how can my leadership help improve my work morale. The answer I gave then is still the answer I would give now. “They can give us candy and cookies everyday after work and the majority of workers will complain about the flavors.” Not everyone loves their job, (God knows I do not) but how do you expect to get a better one if you can not even handle the one you have now. I am not cracking stones with a pick axe, I am not scrubbing floors with a tooth brush, I have a good job with great benefits, if I do not love it, then I work hard and I try to find a job I love. I complain about my job because it has it’s faults, but at the end of the day I thank God I have a job and I don’t have to worry when my next pay check is coming in.

I have been witness to the fall of tough leaders in this world. My eyes have been set upon the injustice that is ‘fear of reprisal.’ I have seen the weak win simply because the strong are too afraid to be strong. When someone is afraid to do their job simply because they are afraid that the matter will be turned into a legal situation is sad. For someone to simply give in because they are afraid to be called a racist, sexist, or homophobic, to me is the downfall of strong leadership. This world of excuses has driven those who would be great leaders to roll over like a submissive dog simply because they are afraid to be branded as someone who does not support people who are different than they are.

It is not racist to fire a person of a different race because they are bad at their job. It is not sexiest to pass a woman up for a promotion because she is not ready for the responsibility.  It is not homophobic to not hire a gay person because they were not qualified for the position. These are valid reasons to make professional choices for the work place.

This new time we live in has turned all of these horrible injustices of the world and twisted them to use for their own agenda. When you cry wolf, eventually the towns people will stop coming. So a woman screaming sexism ten times will get attention whether or not it is truly happening. Then the eleventh time she calls, and it is actually happening, no one will listen. Is that what we want? When a truly illegal and immoral thing is going on for those in power to not take it seriously, because it’s “just another one of those minorities claiming they’re being wronged again.” Is this truly what we want for ourselves, and those who really need help?

Excuses. I was told when I was little that one day I would run out of excuses. I did not understand it then but I do now. Every excuse I made for not performing at my peak no longer applies. I realize now that the only reason I do not perform they way I know I can is because I am the one stopping me. It is not society. It’s not my mom and dad. It is not my teachers or my boss. It is me. If I can not get the job done, it is because I have not found a way to get it done and I need to work harder. I am twenty-four years old and I have just come to that conclusion this year. I have run out of excuses and taken responsibility for my actions. I have admitted my mess ups and asked what I can do to fix them. I have said my faults and asked how I can improve.

It is time to finally stand up and become an adult. It is time for men to stop blaming women, and push past these gender stereotypes. Stop treating women in the work place like delicate flowers and let them work they way they know they can. Make that fact that you are a man the reason why you are strong. It is time for women to stop blaming it on the fact that ‘it is a mans world’ and that is why they failed. Make it the fact that you are a woman why you succeeded. Do what you know you can do, and do it the right way. It is time for the minority races to stop blaming it on the man. Make your triumph in this world because you are a minority, and stop blaming your failures on it. We can be proud to be who we are all day long, but if we are not successful it is pointless. It is time for homosexuals to raise up and live their lives. Stop making your excuse because you are gay, and make it your reason for greatness.

It is time to teach our children how to be the best and not let them settle for mediocrity simply because it is easier. We need to stop giving everyone a trophy. When someone sees another person get the award they thought they deserved instead of them complaining about it, or making and excuses it should light a fire under their ass and make them work that much harder. It is time for this world to be fair, not politically corrected, but fair. The difference is, in a PC world everyone is great, in a fair world, only a few are great and they actually get recognized for it.

We live in a world full of excuses. We say “it is not my fault” every day. We find a reason why everyone around us has messed us up instead of looking inward. We will all have our bad days. We will need to vent and yell and scream. After we are done, we need to get back up and get back to work. There are some people out there who are those scum bags that ruin it for the rest of the world. There are people stuck in the ‘good o’boys club,’ people who still think this is a mans world, and their are people who think only mainly men and feminine women are right.  Some of us might run into a real world situation where a true injustice is being done. That is the time to let someone know and fix it. Until then you do your job and you do it right. Trust me a good hard days work feels a lot better on the sole then a short day complaining about life.  It is time to be adults.


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